More than once I have been approached by a friend or coworker and they start out with a smile and a familiar discussion is started. It is usually occurs in private. It has anticipation and excitement on the fringe.
Hey, I’m not sure you heard, but I don’t want to be the one to spread rumors…
In the past my ears would perk up and I would be excited to get in on the scoop. To hear about someone or something that happened. I have learned it was an inner prideful desire to know something that others did not.
What I have learned over the years, it is never worth listening to. I have learned that no matter what the topic was or who the discussions were about, the insights never made my life any better.
Have you ever noticed that the person always with the inside scoop always seems to create their identity on the idea they know something? The scary part is that we know that we are not the only ones they take their stories to. And most likely, they are talking to other people about us.
Now I have the common sense to quickly respond to those conversation starters with healthy boundaries. When they begin to admit that they should not be spreading the message, I tell them “then don’t”. I tell them that I don’t need to hear it. It was odd the first time I tried it. But I have to tell you, it gets easier and easier.
There is no benefit to hear about someone’s thoughts of someone else. Or what they have heard about someone. Leave your heart and soul to rest and don’t burden yourself. There are enough healthy things we need to pay attention to and rumors are not them.